a crumbling alter

R

amses was unaware of the thoughts running through Xandria’s mind, but had she spoken them out loud, he wouldn’t have faulted her for it. He wanted to be someone trusted. He was an officer who wanted the respect of his peers, but he didn’t think he had to have a stick shoved up his ass the entire time to prove his worth to his subordinates. ”I have to agree with you. There’s nothing more infuriating than meeting someone who rather lounge around like a fat cat, hm?” The conversation shifted suddenly, causing an intrigued hum to echo in the captain’s throat.

He could feel the intensity in her gaze, but he didn’t buckle beneath it. Instead, he offered a slow nod of his crown. ”Yes. I always wanted to serve in the Imperial Army. When you grow up with nothing to your name, you tend to dream of grandeur and adventures. It was just my mother and I.” He explained, his golden gaze unwavering as he met her eyes. He waited for a moment or two before turning the question around on her. ”What about you, Lieutenant? Did you ever contemplate anything else other than the life we lead now?” If she was comfortable enough making inquiries, she should find no issue answering them, right?

The male could only offer an amused chuckle when she called his words bold. Perhaps they were—the Tiamat lineage was talented and well known for their capabilities. He didn’t have the same credibility to his name. ”Then we’ll have to set aside some time for a sparring match, won’t we? I did get bested by Lieutenant Major Nassar Tiamat, but I think that’s to be expected. I’d like to see if I’ve learned anything in my time since meeting with her,” he added.

He knew his next question would catch her off-guard, but her response was acceptable in his eyes. One couldn’t judge another on what they enjoyed doing, but his features mirrored her own when he realized she truly couldn’t think of anything she liked to do with her spare time. ”Living the life of a dutiful soldier can sometimes cause us to forget we are our own wolves. I nearly forgot who I was when I first joined. I was so concerned with impressing my superiors that I didn’t allow myself anytime to decompress.” The grass beneath his paws shifted beneath his weight as he walked, reminding him once again how beautiful the world was around them.

”I enjoy hiking through the woods, or taking a swim to cool off. Sometimes, if I can allow myself the time, I’ll go star gazing. Nature does a lot to alleviate the pressure we put on ourselves.”

art and code by Yahtzee-Penguiduck

@Xandria

Xandria had learned the hard way that trust could be a dangerous weapon in the wrong paws. Any naivete she'd had as a child had long been eaten away by cynicism. It was a relief to be around someone who at least on the surface wasn't judgemental. She was tired of being under constant scrutiny. Even strangers thought their opinions mattered. Their hushed whispers about her mother's impending marriage to Kvothe found her around every corner. The barracks were the only place she was free of the endless gossiping. Most soldiers had better things to do than point and stare. She nodded thoughtfully when Captain Tarek confirmed that it had always been his ambition to be a soldier. To earn glory and honour for his family. You've done well for yourself, she acknowledged, a glimmer of respect in her golden eyes. Then it was her turn to answer. No. I always knew, Xandria answered simply. It's tradition for a Tiamat to join the army when they're of age, she explained, proud of the fact that her family had such deep roots in the military. I couldn't wait to enlist. You can only hear so many stories without wanting to be the hero of your own.

Once again he proved true to her initial assessment that he wasn't judgemental by quickly accepting sparring as her answer and suggested they make time for one. We will, she agreed, already fired up by the prospect of a future spar. A look of interest flickered through her features when he revealed he had sparred with her mother. My mother is quite the warrior. I'm not going to make it easy for you either, Xandria promised, teeth showing in the barest hint of a smile.

She settled down somewhat when he listed off his own hobbies, though her tail flicked erratically. Stargazing? she hummed thoughtfully, intrigued by the idea of it. I'd like to try it. Where do you recommend? Xandria asked, curious about where the best place to view them might be. It was the complete opposite of what she normally did. Always on the move versus just sitting and appreciating something. Maybe it could quieten the storm in her heart.

Art by Bunny

H

er acknowledgement was appreciated, but entirely unnecessary. He hadn't brought up his hardships in life to receive recognition, though her words did touch a part of him that quite enjoyed the praise. "Thank you," he said simply, his voice remaining humble now that they've spoken to one another so long. Her tale earned a nod in turn, though he couldn't say he was surprised. The Tiamat family was well known in the Army, and very well respected for their battle prowess. It was an honor to be accepted by them truth be told. When one came from nothing at all, it felt good to be noticed by such a prestige family. "And you have made quite the impact on me. I find myself impressed with you," he complimented with ease, but they weren't empty compliments offered to a lass who came from a powerful family. "I am sure you will be the hero you wish to be one day - if you are not already there, of course."

Xandria had a certain presence about her that was needed for one to be a good leader. Decisiveness was an admirable trait, and he would not deny that. He offered a faint chuckle when she declared she would not make their spar an easy one, but he wasn't looking for someone to pity him. "I believe I would be quite insulted if you did not give me everything you had. A wolf measures his true strength through trial. It would be difficult for me to determine areas of improvement if I did not lose every once in a while."

He was glad for the peaceful walk with Xandria. She had roused him from a near painful slumber, and given him company he quite enjoyed whilst they walked with no particular destination in mind. Her curiosity was met with a simple hum of his own, but he didn't allow the silence to linger long between them. "There is a place where the trees break to give way to a rolling pasture of green hills in Yorkshire. Within it is a crest of earth that gives one a perfect view of the heavens on on cloudless nights. I find there to be the best place to stargaze," he said, but turned his head to regard her. " Perhaps I could take you there sometime?"

art and code by Yahtzee-Penguiduck

@Xandria

A simple nod was given when he offered appreciation for the praise she had given. It had been a simple observation, but she was pleased it had been accepted for the compliment that it was. Her dotted brows rose when he returned a similar sentiment, one that she might have mistook for false flattery had she not recognised the captain to be a man of integrity. She didn’t lean into a facade of false modesty, no she wore her pride like a badge of honour. Golden eyes gleamed with satisfaction, pleased by the fact that she had impressed him by her own merit and not the blood that ran in her veins. Kind of you to say, Captain, she accepted his praise and bobbed her head in thanks.

His confidence in her was refreshing. She had been feeling like a failure since returning from her leave of absence. The sting of Cairo’s disappointment and her mother’s broken trust in her left a mark she was afraid would not heal. I have a long way to go - if it’s even possible, her voice grew low and heavy with contemplation. Was it possible for a murderer to become a hero? She wanted to do the right thing, help the people who needed it most, but was that enough to wipe the corruption from her soul?

I look forward to testing my skills against yours, she remarked, confident in her ability to hold her own and excited to be challenged by someone who took their training as seriously as she did.

Xandria didn’t have anyone she was close to within the army outside of her family and she was finding, despite their rocky start, that she got along well enough with the captain so when he offered to show her his stargazing spot it didn’t take her long to consider the offer. Very well. I’d like to see it, she accepted, yellow eyes bright with curiosity. She hadn’t done anything like stargazing before so she was intrigued by the prospect of it.

Art by Bunny

R

amses found himself pleased with the way the conversation had gone, though it seemed the two had run out of things to say to one another. While he found he enjoyed her company, he didn't think it was proper to overstay his invitation, and besides; they had just agreed to meet again another night to stargaze. He had a feeling he would see her again soon, and he looked forward to it. With this in mind, the Captain paused in his strides to regard her fully with curiosity shining in those pools of sunshine. "Whenever you're free to stargaze we shall, then. You only need to call on me when you're free, and I'll show you what you've been missing out on."

He offered a brief smile - if Xandria blinked, she would have missed it. "While I have enjoyed my time with you this evening, I think it may be best if I returned to resting. I do think there must be a grain of truth in what the medics say." He tipped his head to her, and moved to turn away before pausing once more. "I bid you a good night, Lieutenant Tiamat." With that, the captain started the return trek back to the barracks to rest more, but the ghost of a smile continued to linger upon his lips.

art and code by Yahtzee-Penguiduck

@Xandria

Her thoughtful musing was sidetracked by the progression of the conversation. Pulling her from the moral quandary which continued to afflict her. She hadn’t realised how much time had passed and was surprised to see that the sky was already darkening. Maybe the walk had been good for more than just the recovering Captain. I look forward to it, Xandria replied, having enjoyed their walk more than she’d expected to. It had been just what she needed to clear her head.

Good night, Captain Tarek. Rest well, she dipped her head, bidding her new friend goodbye, golden eyes gleaming brightly under the glow of the setting evening sun. Stargazing… She hoped she had it in her to sit still long enough to admire them. Even Xandria knew she was not the most patient wolf and had yet to find anything that could quieten the storm in her heart. The extra training she had been throwing herself into had done nothing, but exhaust her body. Her mind however was still burning like a candle at both ends and her thoughts danced like menacing shadows. Peace was what she needed and she hoped that the stars might give her that.

- Exit Xandria

Art by Bunny